


No One Knows

by seventeenmorningstar



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Angst, Drama, Family, Friendship, Love, One Shot Collection, Other
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-11-29
Updated: 2018-11-29
Packaged: 2019-09-02 04:37:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,480
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16779733
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/seventeenmorningstar/pseuds/seventeenmorningstar
Summary: The young ones are also fighting by themselves. Constantly trying to battle their way out of everday's challenges - family, school, money... friends... relationships.This is the story of thirteen boys. Their stories that no one knows.





	No One Knows

The youth constantly struggles to find their place in society. In the eyes of other human beings, this group of individuals struggle with too miniscule of problems in comparison to the working-adults; or too dramatized in comparison to their children counterparts. However, what others cannot comprehend is that, sometimes, the issues faced by teenagers revolve around topics that are too sensitive to thread on - family, home, friends, lovers. The excessive dramatization of these problems is part of the emo-phase which others categorize under puberty. This phase causes rebellion – running away is one of its examples.

"But sometimes it isn't as simple as being _emo_ ," Seungcheol murmured under his breath as he tried to avoid the stares of the professor upfront who was discussing about teenage rebellion and the _emo-phase_.

"Yes, Mr.Choi?" The professor, who was then reading from a book, gently closed what he was holding and made his way towards him. Once standing in front of him, with only the cold-wooden table separating them, the teacher began tapping his index on the edge of the obstruction. His eyes fixated on the boy who, at that time, seemed to find the surface of his desk an interesting subject.

Choi Seungcheol who kept his gaze downcast pursed his lips shut. He did not want to argue with the teacher – not when one week ago he punched the lights out of this exact same teacher and was sent to the Guidance Councilor's office. That was a traumatic experience. Especially when they called his parents over – and after knowing what he had done just kept their lips in a thin-straight line and did not bother talking to him.

The tension kept on building up as the teacher seemed to have no intention of looking away. The sound of a finger hitting the wooden table that matched the ticking of the clock and the deadly-silence that filled the room heightened the anxiety of each student in class.

It was only when the bell rung, signaling the end of the period, that the class was able to let out the breaths they held inside. The teacher clicked his tongue then smirked. He leaned towards Seungcheol, close enough to his ears, and murmured something that irritated him.

"I'll see you guys tomorrow," the teacher announced as he walked away.

Choi Seungcheol let out an annoyed sigh while he relaxed on his chair when the door banged close behind the teacher. He brushed back his hair and shut his eyes to calm himself. _Fucking asshole._

"You okay?"

He opened his eyes and was met with the light bulb and the white ceiling of the classroom. He blinked.

"'sup!" His friend came into view.

"Jeonghan!" He beamed, straightening his back against his chair. "Josh!" He high-fived the boy next to Jeonghan.

"That prof really pisses me off," Jeonghan pulled the chair in front of Cheol; straddling its back between his thighs and comfortably sat himself there.

Joshua, who was leaning against the table right next to Cheol, dramatically nodded, his eyes closed as he did so. "Agree. He acts high and mighty. He even reported you for defending a classmate."

Last week, Seungcheol got annoyed with the teacher for embarrassing one of their classmates. The girl was not able to comply with the format of the requirement and the bastard had the audacity to call her upfront and let everybody knows that she did otherwise of what they were told. The girl was almost crying but the teacher did not even bother holding back. That pissed him off. What he hated the most was adult trying to shame those younger than them to make themselves look better. What he did next, marching forward then punching the lights out of the teacher, was not really for the girl but for himself. He had just enough of adults trying to act that they are better than the youth, when in fact they are as fucked up as them.

"I don't get why they had to call my parents! They could have called my grandma instead she could've done a better job of scolding me." Seungcheol wanted to growl out his annoyance but held his voice back when he noticed that there were still some of his classmates left in the room.

"What did they say by the way?" The middle one – the three of them were born in the same year with him being the oldest, Jeonghan the middle one, and Joshua the youngest – crossed his arms on the head of the chair where he rested his head.

"Did not really talk to me," Cheol shrugged. "Just gave me the 'I'm disappointed in you' look and dropped me off my apartment." He laughed when he remembered being squeezed in between his parents inside the car and neither talked to him.

"What are you laughing about?" Joshua curiously stared at the laughing Seungcheol who was then putting his notebook inside his bag.

"Nah, just some things," he got up from his seat and tapped the head of Jeonghan who, in some weird ways, found the time to take a nap. "Let's go!"

On their way to the Cafeteria, Seungcheol saw Jihoon by the lockers taking out some books. He called out to him which the latter replied to by waving his hands at them. The smaller one closed his locker and waited for the three to reach him; he raised his brows in the direction of a groggy Jeonghan who was clinging on Joshua's neck.

The American boy smiled. "Took a very short nap and now he's all sleepy."

"Idiot."

"I know?"

They high-fived and laughed when Jeonghan strangled Joshua. He straightened his stance and fist bumped Jihoon, "Good to see you again, little boy. Hey!" He reached for his knee that was kicked by Jihoon and exaggeratedly caressed it only to retreat when he saw that Jihoon was raising his legs again in an attempt to give him his second serving.

"This boy," he reached for Cheol's arms and linked theirs, his mouth pouted in the direction of the youngest of them four. "Does not know the word respect."

"I only respect those who does not nap anywhere they go!" Jihoon launched a light punch on Jeonghan's shoulder.

"You have one monster of a childhood sweetheart, honey." Jeonghan whispered to Cheol – loud enough for both Jihoon and Joshua to hear.

Cheol leaned a bit closer to Jeonghan, lips slightly brushing the tip of the other's ear, "I know, babe."

"What do you think they're trying to achieve?" Joshua loudly hushed, whispering but in the maximum volume. He tilted his head downward when Jihoon pulled the sleeves of his hoodie, Jihoon was a small man and one can only bend their knees for him to be able to whisper directly to their ears.

"Trying to be morons?"

"Agree."

The two younger ones laughed and high-fived yet again. Students who were coming out of their classrooms swarmed the hallways – they're either after the cafeteria or going outside. It was becoming jammed and they decided to move and eat at the canteen when they heard someone call out to the oldest one.

"Cheol!"

They looked at where the shout came from and saw Shownu walking down the halls with his group. Seungcheol smiled at the sight of his good friend and gave him a brief handshake when he reached them.

"How are you? Heard you got called to the guidance?"

"Long story, bro."

"Short?"

"Punched the Social Sciences teacher," Jihoon was the one who gave them the brief(est) explanation of what happened while smirking proudly at his hyung.

"Fuck yes!" Exclaimed in unison by Shownu's group; they even hugged Seungcheol to show their approval of what he did.

The teacher he punched was notorious for being the most hated teacher in school – acts high and mighty, embarrasses his students, but does not teach well. Everybody hated him.

"Served him right," Shownu grabbed Seungcheol's shoulders and squeezed it. "Well, we gotta go. Come to the court later!" He let go of Cheol and ran after his group who were already walking away. They soon faded with the number of kids going in and out of the building.

"Those guys are so weird?" Jihoon commented as he walked beside Joshua; the both of them tailing Jeonghan and Seungcheol who were still in a linked position.

"Weird?" Joshua quirped. He even tilted his head while he thought of a better word to correct Jihoon's choice.

"Wind?" Jeonghan intercepted looking over his shoulder.

"Weird. But yeah, they sort of feel like wind.. ish..."

"They come and go?" Cheol tried explaining the thoughts of Jihoon; he did not bother looking at his childhood friend but he sorta knew that the little one was nodding at his explanation.

"Kind of. One day you'd see them lurking in the campus, next week they'd be gone, then you'd see them again."

"Aren't they like part of a body building group or something?"

"So?" Jihoon's head was spinning from the randomness of their topic plus the fact that he was getting hungrier by the second. "Can we walk a bit faster? I'm hungry." He rolled up his sleeves to look at the time on his wristwatch – he only had eighteen minutes to eat.

\---

Seungcheol slammed the door shut as he got in his apartment. "I'm home!" He greeted in a loud voice that echoed in the room. He threw his key on top of the shoe-cabinet and struggled his way inside as he tried to remove his socks and walk at the same time.

"Do we have anything to eat?" He asked while removing his bagpack and throwing it on the sofa. When no one answered he threw himself on the couch, face first, and buried his head on the pillows. "Of course no one would answer," he closed his eyes.

"Of course, nothing to eat."

\---

Seungcheol woke up from the sound of his phone ringing. He groaned before reaching for the pockets of his pants, taking out his phone, and answering the call.

"Yes?" He answered in between yawns.

"Where are you?"

He sat up straight when he was greeted by his mother's voice. "I am at my apartment, Mother." The formality showed not just on his choice of words but from the way he sat, he almost seemed to be in the military.

"Come to the JiYi Restaurant. We're having dinner."

Before he could even answer his mother already ended the call. But that was okay. Being invited by his mother for dinner was already something to be happy about. He got up from the couch and quickly went on to put on a new hoodie.

\---

Seungcheol arrived ten minutes late from what his mother indicated in the follow-up text she sent after the call. When he got to the restaurant, a waiter came to him and asked if he had any reservations so he told him that he was with his Dra. Choi to which the waiter nodded and proceeded to lead him to one of the VIP rooms.

As soon as he entered, he saw his Mother, his Father, two older sisters, and his older brother. They ceremoniously turned their heads to the direction of the door when it opened and resumed eating when they saw that it was him who came.

"Good evening," he bowed at them, especially to his Father.

"Go and take your seat," his Mother motioned him to the chair at the end of the eight-seater-table, beside the empty chair next to his older brother.

He nodded and meekly proceeded to sit where he was instructed to do so. When he got there he quietly greeted his older brother who did not seem to hear him – or chose to ignore him.

"So, Minsoo, how's your residency going?"

Seungcheol grabbed the steak knife and fork lying beside his plate and started cutting, quietly, his food. He even tried listening to the conversation between his parents and siblings but got bored halfway and just continued chewing on his steak. When his eyes lingered on the windows overlooking the Seoul night sky he wondered why he needed to be called in that room – when everybody knew that not one of them wanted his presence there.

_"Every family has their own blacksheep."_

He remembered Jeonghan saying to him when he went to see him after drinking his heart out that night he had his biggest argument with his Father. That was when he plucked up the courage to tell his parents that he wanted to pursue music for his college. And that was when his Father said that no one, and nobody, in their family had the right to go against his orders as the head.

Being born from a family of doctors, every child of the Choi family was expected to practice medicine – or any field in the Natural Sciences. The only exception is when one wanted to do Law. Each and everyone did so – all his cousins either studied to become doctors, nurses, chemists, pharmacists, or lawyers. Nobody tried to go against that unspoken law.

Except him. As a child he felt closer to the performing arts. Music. Dance. He wanted to write music and sing.

Growing up in a family so restricted by what the society dictated them to be that he felt suffocated – as if hands were wrapped around his neck and eyes were glued to his every step. He never had the freedom, not in school but most especially not in his home. The only times he got to feel free were when he was inside his room – writing music and singing his pieces. He knew, as early as ten, that when he grows up, he'd be a musician.

 _"Fool!" His father threw his career guidance report on the floor. His face turning red both from anger and embarrassment_.

_It was his Father's 68th birthday party and he decided to tell him about his plans for college, in front of everybody. He did that so people would know that he was not going to hide behind the Choi family in his decisions in life._

_"Music? You'd be taking the exam for the Medical School I chose for you." His father turned his back and walked away. But Cheol did not want to back down – not on that one dream of his, that one thing he wanted for himself._

_"No. I'd be going to college to study Music!" He grabbed his Father's arm which caused the 68-years-old to almost lose his balance. It was a good thing that Cheol did not remove his hold of his father's arms cause if he did his Father would have fallen down and hit his head on the table._

_Recovering from his unequal footing, Father Choi harshly pulled his arms away from his son's hold. His eyes turned darker from anger. He forcefully pointed at Cheol's chest, again and again, until it almost hurt. "You ungrateful bastard! Trying to kill me? Do what you want! But expect nothing from me!" He turned to his bodyguards who were a meter away from them. "Take this asshole out of here."_

_The guards grabbed him by his arms and lead him outside but before he could entirely been escorted he heard his father announced to the entire hall that he no longer had a son name Seungcheol – that he only had three children, all were medical practitioners._

That was three years ago. It was only a few months ago when they started caring for him again. _Was it because I started making a name in the entertainment industry?_

Two years ago, he together with Jeonghan, Joshua, and Jihoon (who was then a freshman) formed a band called "SVT". They had been doing underground music for two years before an agent saw them perform and asked them if they wanted to break into mainstream. And five months ago, they debuted with almost 10,000 sales – a huge accomplishment for an unknown band. Two months after that they returned and the reception was even better.

"How's your..."

"What?" Seungcheol turned his attention back to their _family_ dinner when he heard a word similar to 'gig'.

"How's your music thing going?"

It was his second older sister. The only one who believed in him. They were somewhat the shield-and-sword duo, against the eldest girl and eldest boy who were the favorites of Mother and Father, respectively. His second sister wanted to do arts but unlike him she did what was expected of her to do – enter a medical university and became a Pediatrician.

"We have a TV guesting this coming week!" He beamed at her and tried to smile at the rest of the family who did not give him any attention – his Father even snorted.

"Come on, Mina. Don't ask that musician-wanna-be-frustrated-murderer such questions," their Father met his second sister with a cold gaze that shut her up. When he was satisfied by her silence he turned his glare at him, "Who invited you here?"

Before he could even speak up his Mother placed her hands on top of his Father's and gently caressed his knuckles. "I did, dear."

"Why?"

"Well, it seems that Yuri and Andrei has some news for us?"

His Mother did not really answer the question and instead diverted the attention of his Father to his older sister and her husband who were sitting next to each other, hand-in-hand. The tension inside the room was already reaching its peak, and to be honest, Cheol was also reaching his breaking point. His Mom's diverging strategy worked wonders.

"Well," his sister, Yuri, rolled her eyes at him before turning to everyone else with a big smile. "Mom," she sweetly smiled at their Mom. "Dad," she reached for their Father's hand across the table. Her smile became wider when she turned her eyes at her husband, "Or should we say Grandma and Grandpa?"

Mrs. Choi started squealing and repeatedly asked if they were kidding. It took their Father a minute to decipher the message but as soon as he did, the darkness caused by Cheol's presence cleared up and his smile reached his ears.

"You're pregnant?" Their dad asked happily, taking his daughter's hand in his and squeezing it.

Cheol's sister nodded. "Eight weeks!"

"Congratulations," Mina got up from her chair and went to Yuri's side to hug her. Minsoo also did the same. Words of congratulations left everybody's mouths.

Cheol went to congratulate her too however his sister _politely_ declined the hug and grimly said a small thanks to his greetings. It took three deep breathes for Cheol to calm himself – did not want punching a pregnant woman.

As the family was busy fuzzing around the pregnant Yuri, Cheol decided to take that moment to leave. He looked back at his family, happily talking with each other about the gender and name of the baby, the gifts they would buy for the baby, and the baby becoming another doctor of the family. He smiled bitterly – another innocent soul trapped by the family's obsession to conform to traditions and society's dictations.

\---

"Drinking? Again?" Jeonghan commented as he took the empty space beside Seungcheol and saw the cans of beer lying in front. He received a call from Cheol at ten asking if he wanted to hang out at his place. And since he does not have anything on his sleeve, he agreed.

Now that he's in Cheol's apartment, which reeked of alcohol, he kind of has a guess on what was happening. He looked at the tipsy Cheol and ruffled his hair. "What did they do this time?"

 _They_. "My eldest sister is pregnant. Yay." He sounded defeated and done.

"That's nice!" Jeonghan tried lifting the topic from the dumpsters. Giving birth to a new life is always a joyous occasion – for the Yoon family that is.

"I know," Cheol whispered and lifted his head from hanging low and stared at the wall behind the TV. His eyes lingered there, his face filled with longing. "But you know? It's sad."

"How?" Jeonghan reached for a can of beer and opened it, froathy foam got out from the small opening which he hurriedly sipped.

The other guy shrugged and kept quiet. The only noise they could hear was the sound of car engines from outside the apartment building. It was like that for a long time between them; sipping beer, staring at nothing, listening to the chorale of car engines and honks. But it was peaceful.

Cheol reached for another can of beer, opened it, and gulped it half. "I hate this. I hate –"

"Hate what?" Another sip of his first beer.

"My family. My father."

"Why?"

Cheol gulped the bottom half of his sixth can. "I envy you. Your Father seemed to be a nice guy."

"He is."

Reached for the seventh beer which rolled out of his grasp so he crawled to get it. The action made him dizzier than before and as he was getting back to his position he fell on his side. Seungcheol laughed at himself for what just happened. "I'm a fool."

"For what?" Jeonghan reached for Cheol's arms and helped him got up from lying on his sides and sat him back against the sofa. He reached for his can of beer and sipped.

"Do you think that I'm a fool?"

"For what?"

Seungcheol shrugged then his shoulders slumped, he looked so dejected. Looking at this Seungcheol and remembering the proud and outgoing leader of their up-and-rising band, one would think they were two different people. Looking at him made Jeonghan sad and angry and emotions he should not feel because he does not know the side of his friend's family – but for him, it was enough to know that a person so bright and cheerful could get so down and hurting because of the people that should have been the first line of support.

"For pursuing my freedom."

"For pursuing your dreams?"

Seungcheol nodded while he opened his seventh can and brought it closer to his mouth. But as the cold tin came into contact with his lips, and the steak he ate for dinner started to rise up on his throat, he stopped drinking. He sighed as he closed his eyes, letting his head rest on his friend's shoulder.

Jeonghan smiled when he felt the weight of Cheol's head on his shoulder. He patted his friends head and leaned his head on top. "You know? My Father once said that parents would always, always, have even the tiniest sense of affection for their child. I believe and I want to believe that it was just a spur of the moment for your Father when he said those things."

Seungcheol laughed. _Spur-of-the-moment... right_. "If you're right, then why does it feel so real?" Then he remembered how they acted earlier; how they acted the first time he came back to the mansion just around a few months ago.

It was their Mother's birthday when he received a call from her asking him to be with them for a family dinner. A small family dinner so that no one would gossip. _Finally_ , he thought to himself, they'd let him be with them again. Spending birthdays, Christmas, and New Years alone was lonely. It was agonizing. So being able to be with them even in just a birthday was something he wanted to do. He went home, greeted his Mother a happy birthday who just gave him a curt smile. When he went to greet his Father he was not even allowed to speak. He was bombarded with words of shame and hatred telling him that he should have not come if he would keep on blabbering about his music or "what shit".

_"I'm sorry for coming to my Mother's birthday," he bowed at the family with a smile on his face. He brought out the debut CD of SVT wrapped in a beautiful emerald green wrapper with a golden ribbon. He handed it to her with both hands which she reluctantly received. "You may throw that away. I just don't know where the trash in this household is anymore so I'm humbly asking you to do so if you find it disgusting." Then he left._

"Why does it feel that whatever I do they won't ever be proud of me?"

Jeonghan reached for the trembling fists of Cheol which he cupped tightly with his hands. He felt sorry for his friend when he felt the droplets of tears on their joined hands. He wanted to comfort Cheol but when it came to this kind of time, words feel so scarce that he could not find the right ones to heal the wounds.

"Why does it feel that choosing myself over their pride was the wrong thing?"

It was hard breathing the same air as that of someone you knew to be so strong yet now was on their feet crumbling into pieces that neither of you knows how to put back together. During these times, Jeonghan wished to be an adult; maybe he'd know the answer to Cheol's question. Maybe he'd know the right words to say. Maybe he'd know how to stop the destruction. Maybe... But adults were also the one who broke him, who chose the wrong words, who chose to riddle him with unanswerable puzzles.

"I'm sorry," he could only whisper to the sobbing mess of Choi Seungcheol. "I'm sorry."

\---

Knocks on the door and rings of the doorbell were what woke Seungcheol and Jeonghan up. They probably slept through the alcohol and the break down. It was Cheol who found his way to the hall and opened the door, all messy and red-eyes, to greet the early guest.

"Choi Seungcheol," greeted the landlady of the apartment building who gave him a once over before clearing her throat. "Just checking if you plan on paying your rent today."

It wasn't a question but an order hiding behind the false-teeth-smile of the landlady. He'd been behind on his rent for two months and last week he received her verbal threat of being kicked-out. "I'm sorry, Mrs. Kim. I'll pay at the end of the month. I promise."

"Well, you already said that last month. And look at where we are now." She smiled unamused.

"Yes," he scratched his head trying to rack some good excuse to spout. "Yes. I promise, I'll pay this time around."

"We're not a charity, Mr. Choi." She turned around; her hair curled in by rollers slapped Cheol in the face. "I'd be expecting three months of rent at the 30th. If you don't, you'd find yourself and your things on the street."

"Yes," Cheol rolled his eyes at the back of his landlady who unexpectedly looked over her shoulder as he was rolling his eyes. He immediately smiled at her, awkwardly at that, "I'll pay!" He waved at her and carefully closed the door.

"You've been behind on your rent?" Jeonghan was then picking up empty cans of beer from the floor and putting them inside the garbage bag he found lying on the veranda. After tying the black bag, he placed it outside and proceeded to gather the unopened beers and placed them in the fridge.

"Yeah," Cheol sat on the sofa, his arms outstretched on the head. He sighed and leaned back his head, closing his eyes when he started to see the room spinning round.

"How?"

"What do you mean?"

Jeonghan found a broom and started sweeping the floor. "We got our shares on the sales, right? That's more than enough to pay half a year of rent?"

"Paid some debts."

"To whom?"

Seungcheol got up and went to the kitchen to pour himself a glass of water which he finished in one go. When he noticed that Jeonghan was looking at him and was still expecting an answer, he smiled at him, "Parents. Siblings."

"What?"

He shrugged. "Well, they did not exactly told me to pay them the money I owe them. Just sorta."

"What money?" Jeonghan gripped the handle of the broom he was holding, gripped it tight enough to hurt himself.

"Everything they spent on me?"

"They kept tabs?"

"Not really. Just those they used for my education?"

"Fucking hell?"

"Fucking hell."

\---

"Even Satan would feel embarrass to accept them in hell," Jihoon forcefully passed the ball to Joshua which was easily stolen by Seungcheol as he laughed at his friend's comment. "No, seriously. What kind of parents would ask their child to pay up the money they used for his education? Shit. Satan is offended."

"No shit," Joshua agreed as he guarded the dribbling Choi Seungcheol. He made a thinking face before he stopped guarding Cheol and announced he ain't playing anymore. "We always lose to these two, Jihoon."

Jihoon who was guarding Jeonghan realized the truth behind Joshua's statement and stopped guarding Jeonghan, too.

"Losers," Jeonghan snorted as he stole the ball from Cheol and the two, in some weird way, agreed without speaking that they'd play each other one-on-one.

"Cheaters!" Retorted by Jihoon as loud as possible from the bleachers which Joshua fuelled by screaming incomprehensible noises.

Joshua leaned back and placed his arms over Jihoon's shoulders and gazed at the hyperactive Seungcheol and Jeonghan playing. "But who would've thought that Cheol's parents would go to that extent?"

Jihoon shrugged. "They probably thought that he'd give up music if he learned the harsh reality of living alone?"

"Could be so."

"But Cheol could've just ignored it, you know?" Jihoon tilted his head and focused his eyes on Cheol who was now on the offense. "He could've said, fuck it, not going to pay."

"And then run away, ya?"

"Well, he's already a runaway."

"Not technically, he was kicked out. Disowned."

"Oh, right. Technicalities. But anyway, knowing that he is not anymore dependent on his parents since the start of college, he could've just ignored their pressuring."

Joshua stretched his arms and folded them over his chest, closed his eyes as if he was trying to think hard enough. "Well, different families have different ways, I guess? Maybe coming from a conservative-old-rich family means that it is harder to cut ties with them?"

"Conservative, traditionalist. I hate those. As if conforming to what is tried and tested is the only way in life. So what if in the liberal arts it is hard to make money? So what if it is not practical? Are they not aware that monarchs enjoy themselves through art? Entertainment? Balls? Music! When was it that people started disregarding arts?"

Joshua laughed at the rant of the younger guy and patted his back when he finally calmed down. "After the Great Depression?"

"I hate Economics."

"History."

"Great Depression has got something to do with the Economy, duffus." Jihoon got up from the bleachers and ran to the two hyungs who were now lying on the cold floor of the court – gasping for air. "Joshua said that Great Depression is History."

"Economy," Jeonghan said in between his breaths.

Cheol punched the other's shoulders. "History is where we learn about it, idiot."

\---

The four went to a family restaurant just beside Seungcheol's apartment after they played basketball in the park; as soon as they entered they were greeted by Soonyoung, a student from the Dance Academy right across their college.

"Hey my music brothers!" The guy with sharp-slanted eyes gave their group a high-five each before placing his arms around Jihoon's shoulder and dragging the small guy towards their table where the rest of his crew were at.

The three older guys shook their heads while laughing at the two who were struggling with each other – Soonyoung trying to keep his arms around Jihoon and Jihoon trying to pry away from Soonyoung's hold. Jun, Minghao, and Dino eagerly waved them hello when they reached their table and told them to take their seats which they gladly took.

"So, what brought you here?" Soonyoung smiled at Jihoon who was still under his captivity.

Jihoon, who decided that he won't try freeing himself anymore because it would take him too much energy, sent daggers to the direction of Soonyoung. "We wanted to eat _peacefully._ " He emphasized the last word by pronouncing each syllable slowly.

"Well, you came to the right table!"

Tired of the proximity Jihoon now resorted to violence. He jabbed Soonyoung's stomach. "We sure did," he smirked as he looked over the guy crying in pain as he caressed the injured part.

Laughter came from the onlookers who had fun looking at the dog-and-cat squabble of the two. Seungcheol even had to stifle his own voice because he was laughing so loud that the people a few feet away looked at them with annoyance and curiosity.

"It wasn't even that hard," Jihoon commented when Soonyoung did not stop _crying_ in pain.

"It was!"

"Agree," Cheol nodded and remembered the sound made by Jihoon's elbow hitting Soonyoung's stomach and laughed again. "He can sue you for attempted homicide."

Jihoon snorted at the comment. "As if this guy knows what that is!"

"Hey!" Soonyoung finally found his voice back and wiped the tears at the corner of his eyes. "That is offensive."

"What? Me saying the truth?"

"You belittled my intellect."

"Wow. Big words. Bellitle. And, intellect."

Before they could even end up to the point that they would hurt each other even more, Jeonghan finally intervened by stretching his arms in between the faces of the two boys. Both of them glared at Jeonghan before settling down in their seats.

"You always go at each other's necks," Jeonghan pointed out as he sat himself back on his chair. "One would think that you hate each other."

"We do!" They both exclaimed at the same time which caused them to glare at each other again.

Dino and Seungcheol were having the funniest time of their lives watching the two. "If I don't know you two, I would think that we're the same age. You act like kids."

"Gotta agree with the youngest one here," Cheol rested his arms over Dino's head and teasingly smiled at the two.

"You're even childish than Jun," Minghao tilted his head to the direction of Jun who was sitting beside him. Who, at that time, was busy playing with the ice cubes in his iced tea.

Jun was about to say something when the waiter came by their table and asked if they were ready with their orders. One by one they gave her their orders and after a good five minutes they finally let her go. The two frenemies finally settled their conflict and was now animatedly talking about the sampler that Jihoon brought for the dance group to listen. Soonyoung and Jihoon were middle school friends and ever since it was always Jihoon who makes the music to which Soonyoung practices his dancing with.

"How about slowing down the break?" Soonyoung suggested after listening to the sample. "What if slow-slow-drop?"

"You want that?" Jihoon took down the suggestion in the music sheet he took out of his bag.

"We plan on incorporating hip-hop and contemporary in our audition piece."

Jihoon nodded while he listened to the explanation and suggestions of Soonyoung and soon after everyone was already pitching in their ideas and the table became rowdy.

\---

Seungcheol was humming and bobbing his head to the music they were able to create earlier as he ascended the plight of stairs to his apartment. He was also juggling his keys on his hands when he dropped it on the floor when his gaze fell on three men clad in black suit standing in front of his door. He gulped.

"Your father wants to talk to you," one of the bodyguards spoke as soon as he got in front of them, his brows raised in question.

He mumbled incomprehensible words of annoyance before he nodded. The bodyguard who was almost his height, shaved head, and with a built body opened the door for him. He gave him small thanks before entering and as soon as he set his feet inside the door closed behind him. He let out a big sigh before removing his shoes. He saw his Father standing beside the door leading to the veranda. Seungcheol greeted his Father who, as soon as he heard his son's voice, turned his attention away from the streets outside to Seungcheol himself.

"Where have you been?" His Father looked at the clock hanging on the wall before he motioned for him to sit on the floor.

As Cheol sat on the floor in a seiza, his Father took his seat on the couch facing him. Seungcheol could only looked up to meet his Father eyes, and in that moment it dawned him that his Father would always be powerful, a force that he would not be able to get rid off. The lion would always prey on the deer and no matter how hard the latter tries to run it'd always end up in tragedy.

"Are you not tired of this, Choi Seungcheol?" His Father's gaze was cold and his voice carried with it the kind of authority and power he had over his employees. It was as if he was talking to a subordinate instead of a son. Bland, monotonous, distant.

"Not yet, Father," he met his Father's eyes with the same intensity and courage he had the night three years ago. He smiled to himself. His mind was clear.

"You're a fool!" The shout echoed throughout the entire room and could have also been heard outside. It made Seungcheol winced and clenched his fist but as soon as he took a deep breath in and exhaled it slowly he was able to fight of the fear that crept in.

"I'm a fool for what?" He smiled sadly at his Father who could not comprehend the simple fact that his son found something he wanted to do aside from what he dictated for his children. That he could not accept the reality that his son was able to traverse life away from his wings. "Fool for wanting to do what I love?"

His Father laughed mockingly at him. "You're too young to say that what you're doing is something that you _love,"_ he sneered.

"I'm already twenty-two, Father," he reminded him. "I'm not a child anymore."

"You'd always be a child to me, child." His Father shook his head, the mocking smile never leaving his face. "And your music shit would always be a child's play." He stood from the couch and started to walk away, his eyes lingered for a split second on his son and Seungcheol saw – he wanted to believe that that was what he saw – a hint of sadness from his eyes. But whatever it was it got replaced by contempt in an instant.

His Father looked over his shoulder before he left the room, "I paid your rent. Be grateful."

As soon as the door closed behind his Father, Seungcheol fell on the floor with a long sigh of the breath he held. "You didn't have to," he cried silently. "You should've just let me be."

\---

Seungcheol slowly pried into his bank account which a week ago has recorded a zero balance. Today, their manager announced that the company had already forwarded their shares for the TV guesting and music show gigs they attended. He smiled when he saw more than what he was expecting and did a small dance of victory. He turned around and faced the machine again, now withdrawing a good sum of money which he then safely and securely placed inside his bag.

He decided to go to a nearby convenient store – bought himself a meat bun, a cup of noodles, and a pack of letter envelope. After paying, he sat himself on the chair near the entrance. He picked up his phone when it started ringing.

"Hello?" He slurped the noodle soup. "Yeah, give me five minutes."

Seungcheol ended the call and hastily finished his meal. He pulled a pen from his pants and started scribbling down something on the back of the envelope he bought. After finishing what he was writing, a car stopped in front of the convi and honked vigorously getting the attention of Cheol. He smiled when he saw a familiar white Range Rover and hurriedly went outside. He knocked on the window of the passenger seat and leaned down, waving at the person inside. The person inside opened the door for him.

"Hey."

"Hi, big sister!" He smiled as he kissed the cheek of her second older sister. "Thanks for picking me up," he put on his seat belt and placed his bag on his lap. He opened it to take out the money he just withdrew from the bank and counted it before putting it inside the envelope.

"You know you don't have to do that, right?" His sister reminded him, her eyes fixated on the road.

"I know," he assured her. "But I want to prove that I can do this on my own."

"Let them still look after you, Cheol."

Seungcheol chuckled and leaned his head against the window of the car. "If I let them be, I have a feeling that they'd use that against me and force me to do exactly what they want."

"They're just trying to help you," she smiled and looked at him when they came to a red light. "They cannot let go of the fact that their youngest baby is not depending on them."

"As if I know, they just hate the fact that I turned out to be a black sheep."

His sister reached for his head and ruffled his hair. "Don't think too much about it."

"How could I not think too much about it? They've been belittling my choice of career ever since. Three years, and what?"

"Calm down, Cheol."

"Three years, noona."

"I know."

He sighed. "Is it that hard to understand? I don't like to go down the same path as the rest of you. Puppets of what the society expect them to be? I don't want to be an empty shell of a doctor."

His sister was silent after that and when he looked at her he saw the pain reflected on her eyes. He regretted what he said and pursed his lips together to stop himself from talking anymore. They were silent the rest of the drive.

Mina stopped the car in front of the Choi Private Hospital. She turned her head towards her brother, reached for his hands that were gripping the envelope, squeezed it, and smiled at him. "I will always be proud of you. May you be a doctor or a musician. Whatever you choose, I will always be here to support you. I am proud that you did not turn into an empty shell."

Seungcheol held her hands in his and stared at her orbs. "I'm proud of you, too. Always." He kissed her cheeks and got out of the car. He waited for her to drive away before walking to the hospital.

\---

The youth constantly struggles to find their place in the society – in their family. Fighting battles that cloud their judgment of which path to walk on in their lives. Sometimes, they lose these wars and succumb to the loneliness and anguish that entails their loss. Other times, they win their games – overcoming the hurdles thrown at them they emerge with their heads held high and a new outlook in life.

But there were times when they stayed stagnant. Like a river that stopped flowing. Like a tree that stopped growing. Like a jigsaw puzzle with one piece missing and no one dared to find it. They remain in what is constant - not because they are lost but because they are afraid of losing more than what they can bargain for.

Choi Seungcheol chose to stay at the middle – in the stagnant, in the constant. To stay with where he felt comfortable and where he could continue his dream.

\---

_Dear Father,_

_Give me another year or two and I will do what you want me to. If the time that I set comes to an end and I haven't made a name in the music industry yet then I would pursue your chosen path for me. But for now let me realize this dream of mine, let me fly alone and search the sky._

_I'm sorry for being a disappointment. But I'd rather be one than someone who did not try to fight for what he believed is his path in life – than someone who stopped dreaming and fighting his fight._

_Your son,_

_Cheol_

_P.S Inside is the money I owe you for my three months rent. Until the time, please do not help me with my finances any further._

_P.P.S I love you._


End file.
